Growing Up To Be A Girl

I was in sixth standard when for the first time in my life, a guy asked me out. I was 11 or 12 years old at that time. He was a year older then me.
My mum had put me for math tuitions. That is where it happend.To this day I do not understand why he did that, I was this thin, dark(thanks to sun hot there!) dirty girl, who used roam everywhere in her bicycle not worrying about getting tanned or anything, playing on streets,with bruises on her knees all the time, I had no sense of dressing nor cared about it, I don't even remember combing my hair or washing my face. Yes I was that bad.
No one had ever paid me any attention, nor was I bothered. I was happy in my own world and little adventures.
I used to collect these mickey mouse stickers back then, one day that guy gave me one of those with those three words written behind it. Well, I was shocked. I didn't even know something like that happens in real life. I didn't know what to do. How could anyone can possibly look at me like that?? I am not that type of girl, I am not even pretty. None of my friends had experienced it how could it happen to me?? Why me?? Those were the only thoughts that came to me back then.
Whole incident changed me. I became shy. I started taking care of myself in public, I grew conscious with guys around. That is how I probably changed from careless kid on street to a GIRL.
Makes me think..Is it necessary for something to happen, to make us change and grow up?? Wouldn't we do it otherwise??


PS: What happend to story uh?? I ended up crying, everyone came to know, and his parents were called. Usual stuff!

My dysfunctional relationship with math!!!!!

I’m an engineering student who sucks at math. No I’m not one of those students who get 95 out of 100 and say I’m so bad at math; I lose all my marks in that subject. When I say I suck, I really do. It took a lot of effort and attempts to clear my four math papers 1,2,3,4. For me graph theory, discrete mathematics, finite automata and formal language is also math, you may say it is not. I have no idea how my papa thought I will be a good engineer, really.

Now, when I was happy that I have cleared all my math paper, comes “aptitude” classes!

Being good at aptitude is very important for placements, GATE, CAT, IAS, and everything else.

Those two hours shatter every little confidence I have in life.

How, you ask?

For someone who cannot even add, subtract, multiply, divide properly without a calculator, well it’s literally being in hell.

They teach you methods which are supposed to be short cuts to solve the problem, through which I’m paying a lot of attention, and still not able to understand, they give you problem like this,

837478*625=?

5793405*9999=?

My heart skips a beat, I am petrified looking at those numbers, it takes me a minute to recover myself , and when I finally take my eyes of those numbers and look around, everyone is scribing and scratching on the book and I have no clue about what to do also, that is where my 25% of confidence is lost.

Another 25% of it is goes when I am not sure what is 6*7. Yes. I didn’t know what 6*7=42 is, stop laughing at me!

I ask my friend, after that when I actually start solving, people start shouting answers, and I’m not even half way through the problems that is where 25% of confidence goes. 75% is gone.

Needless to say zero confidence is left by the end of 2 hours. And all I’m left with a sulking face, and ready to cry.

God please help me! :(

DAY FOURTEEN

Your earliest memory



One of my earliest memory,is of the day my sister was born.

No, I don't remember how she looked or anything. But I remember standing outside the nursing home with  papa, there were lot of dead and some barely alive honey bee's on the floor. Papa told me not to step on it, cause it'll bite. When papa was telling me this, it actually bit someone, and that person was taken inside for injection or something. I was almost 3 at that time.

Another one, is my first day in new school.

My papa got transferred to this place when I was in UKG, we all had to shift there, so I had to go to this new school. I don't remember the name of the school, but it was a convent and it was huge or the little me felt so. My last school had only three rooms, one for baby sitting, LKG and UKG. So this was scary. I remember telling papa not to go, and he told me I'll be standing outside, you go inside. Obviously, he lied.

Dance practice

Well, in UKG in that huge school, there was a school day I think, so our teachers divided us into group of 2, a girl and a boy.I am writing this cause my partner, was the meanest, cruelest brat ever!!! He fucking used to pinch me all the time. I was this dumb female who didn't open her mouth to talk, let alone to complain about him to the teachers! On the day of the program,I was dressed in orange glittering frocks not the point here, they changed my partner, I had to go through all that for nothing..aarrggghhh!!

PS: Girl who used to sit beside me in 2nd standard used to pinch me too, yes I know I was a dumb kid.